I guess it’s really hard for me today because it’s been 10 days. I know that God is in control of this whole thing, I know that if we are supposed to be at Immanuel’s it will happen, and I know that I really feel like it’s the fit we need. Having said all that I don’t know so many other things any more that I just have built into myself this idea that noting is going to really happen, nothing is really going to come of this that I’ll just be told thanks but no thanks. I am sure God knows what he’s doing and if thats the answer then that’s the answer. Sure I’ll be bummed about it, and yes I’ll probably question if I ever really hear from God, but I really do want to keep in mind that whatever is going to be in our life is in God’s hands, not that I have no responsibility, I do but you know it’s times like this that really do make me wonder what it is about me that and my family that makes churches say, oh your nice, oh we loved your teaching, oh we are praying that God will lead you to the ministry that is perfect for you… why isn’t yours? Thats the question that I have, at what point does a church realize that they could benefit from hiring me?
I guess i’m trying to be in that place where I can say my heart will truly say Lord Blessed be your name, the problem is it’s hard to say blessed be the name of the Lord when I want to see more tangible blessings.
Well we will continue to wait and pray and hope.