I know I know, before you all decide to ride me out of my blog on a rail kicking and screaming I am sorry for not posting in a while. When Old man winter, which I must say is a misnomer, I am not aware of many old men who can give as much energy as the snow that we have been a part of in the past three weeks finally let us go it was after a week of being stuck in Western MD with not a wifi signal in site.
Things in the Newell house are progressing quite well, J is back home as are both girls and while I did have that time where there was no one around and I was ready to burn my eyes out from the sheer boredom of being stuck in a house surrounded by snow I am pretty emotionally shot. The ups and downs of the past two years are huge and there are times when I want to crawl in a hole cover it up and wait for the world to stop spinning.
1 Corinthians 10:13 (The Message)
No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit; he’ll always be there to help you come through it.
As I read that passage I must admit I have to question God’s definition of my limit. I am faced with some decisions that are just not fun this coming off the absolute most horrid trying awful time of my life.
Tonight something happened though that made me look at this verse in a different light. I decided to make brownies after I made dinner, now I don’t know about you, but you but one of the best things about making brownies is eating the batter not the finished product. I will admit that there are times in our life when we have made brownies specifically for the batter not for the brownie. I gave Amberly the beater from the mixer, J had a bit off the spatula, and I gave Zoey a little spoon with some of it on there. Zoey went to the dining room ate her little bit of chocolate and then came back and said More. It was so cute and I gave her more. She came back again and I said oh do you want more? She said nope I’m done, and dropped the spoon in the sink.
What does that have to do with God knowing my limit? I think that God knows my limit but I also think that he wants me to recognize it as well. I think he wants to push me so I grow but I also think that He wants me to push back. He desires a relationship with me and I wonder sometimes if some of the pushing that God allows in our life is to make us push into him to talk to him to say Hey okay God I know you said you won’t give me more than I can handle but I wonder if you may have overlooked everything on my plate this week. Please help. Please stop, Please listen. See the pushing makes me realize enough is enough and drives me to a place of prayer and communication with him.